No, you folks don’t like enjoyable, you wish to be depressing, it’s your bit.
by Nameless
Ah, it’s that pretty time of yr when Seattle’s inferiority complicated rears its ugly head within the type of the ridiculously cussed “no umbrella” perspective. Hear, I’ve lived on this metropolis for nearly 30 years, and I adore it (I gained’t say the place I got here from lest I set off that inferiority complicated once more), however you persons are such martyrs. You’re keen to get drenched and depressing simply to dig your heels in on this asinine stance that actually no different wet place on earth takes.
Even the Brits hold calm and use a bloody umbrella, you twats. In addition they have a cute title for them: Brollies. Wouldn’t it make you employ one if we agreed to name them that? No, you folks don’t like enjoyable, you wish to be depressing, it’s your bit. Recover from yourselves! There’s a purpose umbrellas had been invented! No quantity of overpriced, outdoor-chic REI gear goes to maintain you from wanting like a idiot simply so you possibly can really feel superior to the “weaklings” utilizing umbrellas (learn: individuals who don’t have insecurity points).
Do it’s essential get one thing off your chest? Submit an I, Nameless and we’ll illustrate it! Ship your unsigned rant, love letter, confession, or accusation to ianonymous@thestranger.com. Please keep in mind to vary the names of the harmless and the responsible.
